FOUR

Finley turns four today.

When we had Jonah, I thought, "Okay. One kid. That's it."

I still remember when Kristen started talking about another baby. I wasn't so sure. I just kept thinking, "Shouldn't we make sure we don't mess up this first one?"

Getting pregnant Finley was harder. The pregnancy and delivery of Jonah had done a number on Kristen's system. We spent a year meeting with a renowned endocrinologist to sort through all of Kristen's issues and at some point, he began telling us that he could help us get pregnant.

I was scared. Kristen was scared. Could we really go through all the stress again?

We almost didn't have to. Almost.

Kristen's pregnancy went smoothly. Not much drama - few episodes of high BP, but nothing too scary. And we had this little girl.

This sweet, adorable, pudgy little treasure that we had waited and prayed for.

A week after she got here, Fin was back in the hospital, very sick. They didn't know what it was. They checked for every sickness they could think of and never could find it. We cried. We prayed. And we looked at each other and our families with the unspoken question..."Why?"

I remember Kristen sitting on the hospital bed, her makeup smeared and her eyes focused on the incubator where Finley was asleep.

"I just want my baby." She kept saying.

When we finally got her home, we didn't know what to expect. What was this little girl's life going to be?

For four years, we've watched as this little girl has colored our home with sweetness and pure silliness. She came into this crazy house of ours and brought a peace and fun that I believe is truly God ordained. Sure, she's a miracle baby. But the more folks I meet, the more I realize that every baby is a miracle. Finley's more than that to me.

After four years, I see her as a sign. A living, breathing symbol of how God knows what our families need and provides it when we least expect it. Today, we thank God for Finley. For her laugh, for her smile, for her dancing and most of all for her influence on us all.

Happy Birthday, Fin. Daddy loves you.

DO/DON'T

We've all experienced various dining situations in our lives. We've seen terrible service and we've seen the best. It's fair to say that our preferences regarding waitstaff are as varied as the food tastes themselves, but I'd like to offer this honest, albeit personal, list of recommendations for those brave souls who endeavor to serve patrons meal after meal. After meal.

DO

• Check on my table. Nine times out of ten, I'm going to be fine. I'm not gonna' need anything and I'll just thank you for checking. For me personally, this is a top priority of mine in dining service.
• Be honest. I like it when you tell me what's good and bad on the menu. I like that you tell me whether or not my complicated order is possible.
• Be patient with my kids. I know it's frustrating when kids are "ordering." They're still learning this whole manners thing, but I'm trying to give them chances to see how it's done. Your patience here means the world.
• Drink refills. Vigilant refill maintenance will ensure a better tip, I promise!
  

DON'T

• Don't try to be cool. Don't squat down by my table or call me "boss" or answer every single question with "SURE!" before I'm even done asking it. Don't use a bunch of tired jokes. Just be normal. It looks better on you!
• Don't give me too much information. This is tricky, because I know waiters and waitresses work hard to connect with each table. But personally, I'm not a fan of the four minute story about "One time me and my husband went down to the SeaWall and we had the BEST fish tacos there. See, his mom was real sick and we were down there for, like, 9 days? Every time I have the fish tacos here I remember that trip. It wasn't really a 'fun' trip, you know? But those tacos were really good...really good." I sincerely do appreciate waitstaff trying to personalize the experience, but just make sure it's not too much, too fast.
• Don't sing or dance in the aisles or make ridiculous comments on the restaurant intercom. I realize that stuff like this is the gimmick at some places, but it gets a little embarrassing.
• Don't forget to introduce the waiter you're training. It's always weird when you walk up with some guy or girl that just stares at my family. Take a second to tell us they're learning. It makes a huge difference, and I bet the more you talk through it, the more relaxed you're trainee is going to feel.
• Don't be dirty. You know...bathe, okay?
  

That's my waiting do/don't list. I have a few friends that work in restaurants and I know that it is truly one of the trickiest jobs a person can attempt. You're working with tons of different personalities and values every day. If you're a waiter or waitress, let me just say that I applaud you for coming in every day to a job where you know folks will be rude or selfish or unfair to you. Thank you for trying to be awesome at your job anyway!

What about the Todd Blog readers? What's in your Waiter Do/Don't List? Comment below!

SHE...

I've known Kristen a long time. In fact, our fathers played music together for many years when we were kids. Kristen's little brother and I were in a horrible garage band in high school.

Our town was big enough to ensure some privacy, but small enough to make sure everybody had their "label." All I knew of Kristen was that she was dating a guy and it was very serious. That was fine by me...I was busy trying to become a rock star.

When I got the call to play a gig at Kristen's church, I didn't think anything of it. One more chance to play my sad, minor-chord, introspective, challenge-the-mundane epic ballads!

And then I saw her...

And I couldn't believe it. She was more than beautiful. I didn't have a word for her. She was absolutely the most unattainable, perfect girl I had ever seen in my life. And I knew I'd never have her. She was dating a guy...she was gorgeous and smart and funny and had her life together.

But it didn't matter...

The church asked me to stay on as an acoustic guitar player for the worship team. So I did. And I took every opportunity to talk to her. I still didn't know about the guy, but I figured he might actually be out of the picture.

And then we went out. We sat at this little Mexican food restaurant and talked until they closed. And I was done.

Some say "smitten" or "in love." Yeah, it was that. That and more.

I get to share another birthday with her today. And I can't imagine life without her.

Happy Birthday, Krist. This life has turned out better, more wonderful and more joyous that I could have dreamed.

SUNDAY SETLIST 1/31/10

I was nervous about Sunday's set. I didn't have any fears about technique or delivery, but I was worried that the songs wouldn't work well together. (I think most worship leaders have sets like this - where he or she worries it's not gonna fit together. However, I think most worship leaders don't admit they have those fears.) This was one Sunday that ended up working. Thank you, Lord!

SONG 1 - YOU HAVE SAVED US (A)
Been a month or so since we did this one. It came off okay. First song at Bethel is always a tricky thing because so many folks are still wandering in (or trying to find a parking place!) This one went good for a first song. I'm really impressed at how confident Ray W. is getting on delay. He's really starting to own that effect and figuring out where to place it.

SONG 2 - NOT TO US (B)
This song went SO great! We had Tim do an extended synth intro that was a great lead-in. This one rocked pretty close to the CD version. We made a couple of adjustments - the 2nd intro pass was full, rather than half. Then we built some extra choruses after the bridge. As we came out of bridge, we ran 2 choruses with drums and percussion. First one was drums and perc only and second one added bass and synth. By the third chorus, we were JAMMING!

WELCOME
Didn't have much in the way of announcements, so we welcomed folks and then let them greet one another.

SONG 3 - THANK YOU, LORD (F-G)
One of the strongest parts of this tune is the extended keys/guitar instrumental 3/4 of the way through. However, it's a long instrumental break and is really best suited to a crowd that's more comfortable with a spontaneous worship time. We've never done the break for that very reason, but this week we changed the game. We actually had Tim and Smitty do the extended instrumental to start the song. It was very cool. Really changed the song from that country-pop style to something nice and jazzy. As we were leading, I just had this impression that the phrase, "Thank You, Lord" really was perfect for us. Understanding that our crowd is a mix of folks in all different walks of life, I encouraged them to express their gratitude even if they weren't feeling it.

SONG 4 - PASS IT ON (G)
This is a Tommy Walker tune from his last project. I've wanted to do it for awhile, but just haven't put in the set. This one took a little tweaking on Thursday night at rehearsal. I ended up making a few small changes. First off, I taught the congregation the chorus with just my guitar. I think we did three runs of chorus before the band came in. We also killed the second verse for this particular Sunday. The melody of the verses is a little tricky so I decided to verse one both times - that way folks aren't worried about phrasing a new set of lyrics to the melody. By doing verse one both times, you built comfort into the process of learning a new song. We made sure to double up first chorus as well....it adds some length to the tune. I changed up the melody on the bridge a bit...it's cool, but I'm still not sure what to do with it.

SONG 5 - GLORIOUS DAY (C)
I'm familiar with Jeff Johnson's "Glorious Day." I knew Bethel had sung it before I got here, but I kept forgetting to put it in the set. Mark Kuykendall, our youth pastor, had asked me to include it as a tie-in with his sermon. Originally, he had asked for a modified, shorter version of the tune, but I ended up doing the whole thing.
We did bump it from D down to C and we cut the double chorus ending, but other than that we were pretty close to Johnson's version. Worship on this one was passionate and loud. I really don't believe in "magic songs," but I do see that this song is a clearly written, fun-to-sing, dynamically diverse piece of music and folks will always respond to that. From a songwriting perspective, I think the pre-chorus makes this song. On paper, "Glorious Day" shouldn't work. The verses are the same two chords over and over and very wordy. The chorus is one line repeated over and over. Most songwriters would tell you - that don't work. But the pre-chorus of this tune changes everything. It's perfect. Placed just right in the flow of the song and built as a perfect transition between song sections.
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The set ended up working well. "Glorious Day" did seem to fit right where Mark was, so that was a great call on his part. It was a great day...grateful for the chance to be there!

Things They Don't Tell You About Marriage

• Most of your fights will be about things that are completely ridiculous. The last fight Kristen and I had was about onions. I kid you not.
  
  
• Keeping a "date night" is very important. But near impossible to maintain.
  
  
• Nap while you can. Because once the kids come along...not so much with the naps.
  
  
• Be careful of arrogant married people who'll try to force you to do your life the same way they do theirs. (There are more of these people than you think...)
  
  
• Sometimes the smart thing to do is just keep your mouth shut.
  
  
• Brag on your spouse. Be sincere and take every opportunity to praise your beloved.
  
  
• Your spouse isn't you. Seems easy, but it truly is one of the hardest things to learn!
  
  
• Know your gifts. Know your weaknesses. And know them well.
  

...that's when I fell in love with music.

For every musician, there are moments. These specific moments are etched into us and most of us can still recall them with a crystal clear retelling. For most musicians, music is a calling. Whether it's a call to serve in the music of the local church, write pop songs for mainstream radio, share vague Celtic music covers or rap about math facts, most of us feel that music is more than just something we like.

And for most of us, that calling opened up to us in amazing and wonderful musical experiences. Here are a few of mine.

1. Learning Steven Curtis Chapman's "For Who Really Is" from a SPARROW RECORDS: FRONT ROW VHS tape. I spent hours copying the guitar chords and strum patterns and when I had learned the song, something changed for me. I wasn't observer anymore and my heart came alive when those words and sounds were coming from me and not a TV speaker.
   
   
2. When Kristen and I were dating, I wrote my first worship song. It was called "Covenant Love" and it was horrible. But I loved it at the time and the first time I led worship with that song was one of the most enjoyable experiences of my life. And underneath the ego of hearing your words sung back to you and the ownership of having your own music, something else was shining through. In those four minutes, the responsibility and chaos and potential of writing worship songs came home for me.
   
   
3. "Pride (In the Name of Love)" from Rattle and Hum. On one vacation, I probably listened to this song 100 times in a row. Looking back on it, I realize that I was most moved by the zeal of the track...that a song could generate that sort of response. It was the biggest song I had ever heard in my life.
   
   
4. My next musical moment came much later, after I was married with kids and leading worship in a church. My dad passed me a DVD of Baloche's "Offering of Worship" project and I was literally moved to tears watching the title track. It wasn't an issue of just liking a song, it was actually hearing a song that said everything I wanted to say in my heart. It was probably the first time I had ever heard a worship song that so powerfully and perfectly connected with where I was in relation to God.
   

A Case For Repetition...

I've been thinking a good bit about songwriting lately. (That tends to happen when you decide to record a new album!)

When writing a collection songs, most writers work hard at avoiding repetition. A songwriter wants each song to be something fresh, something unique from the others. But a recent CD purchase has forced me to rethink my position on too much of the same thing.

I've been a fan of Sovereign Grace worship for years, but their new Sons & Daughters project is one of the best things they've ever done.

As I've listened, I've been moved by the record's repetition. The theme of this project is expertly done and presented with crystal-clear precision. Basically...it works.

The whole project is filled with words and phrases like "heirs with Christ," "adopted," and "orphans." It makes for a powerful listening experience.

I understand the difference between a record like this and the songs I'm endeavoring to write. One is done in a "sampler" style wherein multiple writers come forward with their individual take on the one large theme and the other is a collection of songs to fit a congregation through a particular season of a church's life.

But it has forced me to rethink repetition in the pursuit of a cohesive theme - whether it's an album or just a set of Sundays at church. While I want to write things that are fresh, I also want to have a solid grasp of the ideas needed for a given period of creation.

10 Ways that Jonah is like his Daddy...

1. He loves video games.
   
   
2. His favorite TV shows are "MythBusters," "World Scariest Police Chases," and "River Monsters."
   
   
3. He lives to make people laugh.
   
   
4. Foo Fighters get him crunk.
   
   
5. If it explodes, ignites or creates destruction, he's all in.
   
   
6. He loves a party.
   
   
7. Nothing brings him greater joy than hanging out at home with the family.
   
   
8. He's a sensitive little guy.
   
   
9. The louder the better.
   
   
10. He never runs out of hope.
    

SUNDAY SETLIST 1/10/09

Kicked off a brand new 10-week sermon series Sunday called "The Gospel: In Everyday Life." Didn't have much in the way of media, but we did introduce a new plan where our Sunday night life groups will follow the 10-week study with discussion guides, scripture, etc.

Here's what we did during Sunday's service.

SONG 1 - CALL UPON YOUR NAME (Don Poythress)
This song was a good test for us. Now, I love Don Poythress, but so far, I've been anxious to add another one of his songs to our catalog. My fear is that it would come off as too "country," but the song worked perfectly. There's a definite Americana feel to it...especially with regard to melody, but I thought it came across great. The band did a fantastic job. Ray Wilson especially gave it just the right blend of rock and twang on electric guitar.

SONG 2 - TODAY IS THE DAY (Lincoln Brewster)
Ah, I remember when this song was hard....
Okay, that might be a bit much, but today was a great moment for me to realize how far this team has come in a year. I remember the band learning this song and all of us wondered if it would EVER work! This one went like clockwork. Bruce McMinn did a great job on drums.

SONG 3 - A THOUSAND TONGUES (Michael Neale)
Michale Neale's hymn remake is really good. I think our first set version went better than the second, but both were good. We probably good have amped up the energy some, but overall, the song was really tight.

SONG 4 - LEAD ME TO THE CROSS (Hillsong)
Second week to do this song. This was my week to assess this thing to see if it works. I think the song does work for us, but I'll probably make changes next go around, specifically the Bridge-Chorus-Chorus. The bridge fall just doesn't work and I think the double choruses at the end stretch the song out too long. Sarah and Elizabeth were so strong on vocals on this one. I loved hearing them sing it
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SONG 5 - COME THOU FOUNT OF EVERY BLESSING (Matthew Smith)
We don't do Matthew's version note-for-note, but we try to capture the overall feel. So far, this song has worked every single time we've done it. Probably could add more verses in to stretch out but that would be killing the instrumental interlude that breaks up each verse.
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It was a great day. The team had a great attitude, they nailed their parts and they were engaged in what was happening in the room. Now, to do it again next Sunday!

(LIST) 10 Comedians that Make Me Laugh

• Nick Swardson. Nick's a refreshing change from the way overdone dry, sarcastic, random comic style made popular by Demetri Martin, Mike Birbiglia and the like.
  
  
• Jim Gaffigan. Gaffigan's the gold standard. Don't know of anybody who does it better. Witty, great delivery, very creative and prolific with his work. I've yet to meet any one who doesn't dig Gaffigan.
  
  
• Cedric The Entertainer. Oh my gosh. This dude is funny. All. the. time.
  
  
• Daniel Tosh. Most folks know him better for his Comedy Central show, Tosh.0, but Daniel Tosh's stand-up is everything Dane Cook wants to be. It's lightning fast and aggresive without sounding programmed.
  
  
• Katt Williams. It's not just that Williams is funny...this guy is inspirational. If you can endure the language, Katt's rants are some of the most encouraging, motivational stuff you'll hear from a stand-up.
  
  
• Chris Rock. Strange as it may seem, Chris Rock is one of the few comedians that really "hits" me. When I watch him work, I hear myself saying "That's so true!" This guy's jokes resonate.
  
  
• Mike Green. I stumbled on Mike's work a couple of years ago. I finally found him on twitter and YouTube and I'm pumped to follow him. His comedy album Burnt is one of my all-time favorite comedy records.

How 'bout you? Any stand-ups you dig?

Sometimes, A Man Stands Up:

I hope I don't offend with this post. I try to stay away from controversial posts, but this has to be said.

It's my hope that this blog would somehow find it's way to the people who run the Dairy Queen corporation.

Please know that I support the DQ. I've been a longtime fan of their many, many delicious treats and hearty meals.

But I can't hold it in any longer.

Here goes...

DEAR DAIRY QUEEN,
ENOUGH WITH TURNING THE BLIZZARD UPSIDE DOWN. WE GOT IT.

THANKS.

Really? They're still flipping over the Blizzard? This is like the longest running fast-food gimmick in the history of deep fried items and drive through lanes.

What's the reasoning behind continuing to do this? Is there some random family that hasn't had a Blizzard in the 20 history of the soft serve wonder? Is there some guy in a minivan screaming,

"Kids! Get up here and look at this! This lady just turned the ice cream UPSIDE DOWN!"

It doesn't impress any more. In fact, it just seems to add a level of awkwardness to the transaction, doesn't it?

I pay my money, the dude brings it over and I reach for it...but no, he's got a flip it. So I sit there and wait for it. I'm not impressed. Neither is the employee. Let's stop the charade, huh, DQ?

For crying out loud, it's a freaking BLIZZARD. I don't buy it because it defies gravity...I buy it because it makes my heart happy.

Anybody else with me on this one?

TRAILERS

A few of the trailers I saw last week at the movies....and my witty commentary.


SALT - I liked this movie. When it was about Jason Bourne. (ZING!) Even though I like anything with explosions and espionage and fighting, I'm not an Angelina fan. Probably will 'pass the Salt.' (Please tell me I'm the first guy to say that about this movie...)


THE BOOK OF ELI -Denzel? Oldman? Apocalypse? Yeah, I'm in. Totally in.


PERCY JACKSON & THE OLYPMIANS: THE LIGHTNING THIEF - The movie doesn't look all that great. Probably a great book, though.


ALICE IN WONDERLAND - Nope. No way. No no no no.


TO SAVE A LIFE - This looks fantastic. Lots of redemption and clarity in this one. Definitely gonna' see this one!

KNIGHT AND DAY - I actually would love to see this. (None of the YouTube vids are authorized for embedding. LAME.) This looks like just the right mix of silliness and cool. Maybe enough to put Tom back on top?

How do these look to you?

Resolute...

I've never been big on making a bunch of goals for the New Year, but I am excited about this new resolution of mine.

I've heard of guys doing this over the past couple of years and I've decided to give it a try.

I'm setting out to write one song every month this year.

Now, that might not seem like much. You may think, "Don't songwriters just write all the time?"

Not this one. In fact, I'm one of the slowest writers around. Couple that with a very busy family and church life and songwriting ends up getting pushed to the back burner more times that I care to admit.

So, for me, 12 songs is huge. In fact, it seems so scary and unattainable that I'm forcing myself to share with readers and viewers to keep me accountable! And somewhere mixed in that fear and trepidation is excitement. Excitement to come to the end of 2010 with at least 12 worship songs written. They won't all be good, but they'll all be done, and that's what I'm going for this year.

I'll post videos of the songs as they're done and I'll probably keep it under that goofy little thing I do called "SongWrighting." (hee hee) I'll probably end up calling it SongWrighting 2010 or something totally boring like that.

Now, to get started, I'm going to cheat a little. (You don't mind, do ya?)

I've talked a bit about this new song, MAKER OF MY DAYS, and although it was technically finished in December, I'm going to use it as my January song. I guess I could just lie and say I wrote in January, but I try not to lie if I can help it.

So, hopefully next week you'll see SongWrighting 2010 Song #1. Okay, that's a horrible title. Gotta' spice that up a little before the new tune drops!

EIGHT

He turns eight today and I'm not sure why...but this one feels different.

Maybe it was a few weeks ago when he fell asleep in the car and I carried him in the house, noticing that his legs almost touch the ground when I hold him.

Maybe it's the way he walks so boldly into school every morning...with that quick "Love you, too, Dad" and that quick walk inside.

Maybe it's the way he talks, the words he uses sounding like something a teenager would say.

I don't know...but it just feels different.
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Jonah,

By now, Mom and I see glimpses of the person you'll be. After eight years, we're seeing some of the stuff that's truly a part of who you are and not just the by-product of a little boy trying to figure out what his identity is.

Oh, sure, there's lots left to discover, but some of that is already done. Even now, some of it so clear:

You're a Learner: you don't take things at face value. You want to know why people invented DVR and what "go figure" means. You want to study war and science and humor and friendship. Nothing brings you more joy than figuring something out.

You're a Loyal Friend: anybody who calls you friend is lucky, little man. I don't know of anybody more loyal and faithful. For you, loyalty is as easy as breathing. It's second nature to you and you're blessed to have it. Loyalty is fast evaporated in today's climate and you remind me every day what a great gift faithfulness is.

You're all Love: some may call it "wearing-your-heart-on-your-sleeve," but to my eyes, it's all Love. You invest your whole self in the things you care about. If you love something, you know it inside and out, you want to tell the world about it and you want to celebrate it as much as you can.

In the end, there will be a lot of things that you'll 'become,' Jonah. But your curiosity and loyalty and passion are three central characteristics that I intend to nurture and protect.

Some parents are saddened by this time, but not me, Jonah. I couldn't be any more excited and prayerful for you.


I love you, man.

Daddy.