FOUR

Finley turns four today.

When we had Jonah, I thought, "Okay. One kid. That's it."

I still remember when Kristen started talking about another baby. I wasn't so sure. I just kept thinking, "Shouldn't we make sure we don't mess up this first one?"

Getting pregnant Finley was harder. The pregnancy and delivery of Jonah had done a number on Kristen's system. We spent a year meeting with a renowned endocrinologist to sort through all of Kristen's issues and at some point, he began telling us that he could help us get pregnant.

I was scared. Kristen was scared. Could we really go through all the stress again?

We almost didn't have to. Almost.

Kristen's pregnancy went smoothly. Not much drama - few episodes of high BP, but nothing too scary. And we had this little girl.

This sweet, adorable, pudgy little treasure that we had waited and prayed for.

A week after she got here, Fin was back in the hospital, very sick. They didn't know what it was. They checked for every sickness they could think of and never could find it. We cried. We prayed. And we looked at each other and our families with the unspoken question..."Why?"

I remember Kristen sitting on the hospital bed, her makeup smeared and her eyes focused on the incubator where Finley was asleep.

"I just want my baby." She kept saying.

When we finally got her home, we didn't know what to expect. What was this little girl's life going to be?

For four years, we've watched as this little girl has colored our home with sweetness and pure silliness. She came into this crazy house of ours and brought a peace and fun that I believe is truly God ordained. Sure, she's a miracle baby. But the more folks I meet, the more I realize that every baby is a miracle. Finley's more than that to me.

After four years, I see her as a sign. A living, breathing symbol of how God knows what our families need and provides it when we least expect it. Today, we thank God for Finley. For her laugh, for her smile, for her dancing and most of all for her influence on us all.

Happy Birthday, Fin. Daddy loves you.