MINDGAME

I don't mean to presume that just because you're reading this post, you know everything about me.

But since most of my readers aren't necessarily new readers, you probably know that I've spent the last 30+ weeks trying to become a runner.

I'll be honest - my progress has been slow. But since I'm an outta-shape dude, I wasn't really planning on knocking out 26 mile runs anytime soon. (or ever...)

But as with any athletic goal, eventually we begin to learn things about ourselves that have nothing to do with the physical world.

Lately, I've been surprised at how my perspective on the running has changed.

At first, my enemy was the timer. My battle was to run the five-minutes without stopping, staring at my stopwatch to make sure I was able to walk again at the soonest possible second.

Then the enemy was the hill. That stupid hill on the other side of our neighborhood. Once I was able to conquer it once, then I had to try it twice. And then three times. Success was basically finishing that section of the run without giving up.

After that, the enemy was the wall. For me, the wall was 20 minutes. I could knock out 20 minutes but my legs just would not go past that mark. And each run became about the possibility of being willing to challenge that wall.

I'll not make light of those enemies. I won't say that the challenge was really something else. No, those were real battles and to dismiss them would be to make a joke of the victories that accompany them in this story.

But the enemy has changed.

Now, the enemy is my mind.

Historically, I can run without being glued to a clock. I can take that hill now anytime I want. I can run for 40 minutes without stopping. (The record so far...)

But the battle is now in my head. I know that my body can do the things I want it to, but...

Do I want it to?