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Monday, May 05, 2008

Stuff To Do Before Applying At United...



I've wondering what sort of things a worship leader ought to do before he or she sends in their application to work for Hillsong Church's United Youth Worship team.

1. Get comfortable with the key of B.
2. Buy cooler clothes
(like vests or really tight t-shirts.)
3. Prepare yourself to be on stage wih 84 people.
4. Exercise - jumping and singing is hard on the body.
5. Have this phrase ready at all times -
"Um, sure, Darlene. You guys can do that song. Record it for your own albums? Oh, yeah...absoluteley."
6. Steele yourself to avoid making goo-goo eyes at Brooke Fraser. Or sending her flowers anonymously. Or making a shrine to her in your home.
7. Try not to giggle every time Brian Houston says his last name.
8. Do some vocal warm-ups
. (For the required octave jumps.)
9. Do not make Crocodile Dundee jokes. Ever.
10. Get comfortable with the key of B.


So, what have I missed? What else should one do before moving down under to work at America's favorite church?

Disclaimer: Please note that the I appreciate the music of United. I use their songs and have for years. Folks always seemed to get miffed when I blog about things I find funny about worship culture. (And there are some very funny things about worship culture.) It's lame that I even would worry about the need for a disclaimer like this, but experience is teaching me that I'm not always as funny to everyone else as I am to myself. So, seriously, if stuff like this bothers you, please let me know.

5 comments:

Jeff said...

I think you left off "come out with a new worship album every 4 days".

Also, I saw "Iron Man" Thursday night and thought it was the best comic book movie ever. Way better than Superman, Spiderman, X-men, etc etc.

Johnny! said...

Buy a hair iron?

Romack said...

I love number 7. Very funny.

Todd Wright said...

#7 was just for you, Romack. You're the first guy who ever pointed out how funny that actually sounds.

Anonymous said...

whats wrong with #6