Things I'd Be If I Hadn't Met Her...

Couples often benefit from "looking back." Thinking about the road you've traveled together can be a sobering, yet grateful experience. For those married who follow Jesus, these remembrances are profound testaments to God's kindness and unmerited grace.

Couples are always looking forward. "We'll be out of debt in five years" or maybe "I'd like for the kids to go to a state college" or "one day we'll build our dream house." This collective goal-setting can be a much-needed motivator for lean years while we struggle toward something better.

But one of my favorite things is to change history. Imagine traveling back in time to find the "young you" on the day you met your spouse. What would life be like if you hadn't gone to that party or held open that door or gone on that blind date? What would life be like if somehow, you two had missed each other?

In a about four months, I will have been married to Kristen for 13 years. There's no doubt that she changed my life, and it's fun to think of all the ways she's done it.

Here are a few things I'd be, if I hadn't met HER...

1. SULLEN. I've mentioned it before, but before I met Kristen, I really thought all "artists" had to be introverted and serious and tormented. From day one, Kristen saw through my pretense and pulled the real me out from hiding. Without her, I'd be a sad, sullen, tortured artist. It might make for good art (not sure) but it sure would be a joyless life.
   
   
2. IN MY PARENT'S HOUSE. I'm not totally sure of that, but it's probably a safe bet. Kristen brought her love of challenge into my life. If I'm ambitious or hopeful or a dreamer in any way, it's because of her constant example of momentum - she doesn't want the same old thing. She wants the next thing. And that's pushed me to places I never thought I'd be.
   
   
3. A CREEP. When Kristen and I started dating, I only had one thought - "Why is this babe talking to me? She's way too awesome for me!" Without her, I'd probably be a 400lb. blogger who never left his house and spent all day writing weird love letters to famous actresses. When I found Kristen, I found someone so valuable and precious that I none other could replace. I'm telling you...after 13 years, this girl still makes my jaw hit the floor. And every time she knocks me over with that amazing smile of hers, I thank God for her.
   
   
4. MORE DUMBERER. Spend half-an-hour with Kristen Wright and you'll realize something. She's smart. Smart. Spend a day with her and you'll see it in action. If she doesn't know the answer, she's going to get it. If you think I'm dumb now, you should have seen me when I was single. YOWZA!

Without even trying, Kristen Carnley has made every aspect of my life better. And when I am aware enough to think of such things, I thank God for her. He gave me exactly the girl I needed.